Dear God,
Please take us away from Pinellas Park, Florida. I miss watching cartoons on Saturday morning. Ed, Edd and Eddie, Mucha Lucha!, Teen Titans. Those are my favorite cartoons. Thank you God for cartoons.
Why is everyone so angry, God? In church, Pastor Reynolds says we should love our brothers and respect our fellow man. But out here he's been so angry. I've heard some bad things about the husband of the lady in there, the lady who they've tied down and aren't feeding. That's a bad way to kill someone. Why are they killing her God? My mom won't tell me exactly what happened to her. She says "Pray for Terri honey. Just pray for Terri." And I am, but I don't know why, exactly.
I sure like my sleeveless t-shirt. Baby-blue is my favorite color. I wanted to get all my shirts in baby-blue, but my dad won't let me. He scolds me for saying baby-blue. "It's just blue." But I know it's baby-blue. I have a crayon the exact same color and it says baby-blue on the box. It's my favorite crayon too.
I like laying in the grass and looking up in the sky. The sky is baby-blue too. I pretend I'm flying. Flying far, far away. Dad says I play pretend too much. I asked him if praying and playing pretend were the same thing. He sent me to my room with no dinner.
Everyone is praying really hard now for Terri. God, why do people pray? It doesn't seem like much fun. There are people crying. People are saying your name over and over. Two days ago, Gramma passed out and the police had to help her get awake. The ambulance even showed up! That was really sweet. I wanted to ride in the ambulance, but my dad yelled at me. He said it was serious, and I needed to pray for Gramma and Terri now. Pray, pray, pray.
So I am. I don't know any of the other kids here. Well, except the Baileys. But they're in home-school and wear homemade clothes. No baby-blue there. Mom buys all our clothes at Wal-Mart. She lets me push the buggy. I love going to Wal-Mart! Mom laughs when I try on all the sunglasses and hats in the store. I'm so happy when she laughs. Not like this.
People press their hands together so tight that their fingers turn white! Dad said he's going to let me run in there with some water for Terri, but I told him I was scared. He didn't say anything, but I could tell he was mad at me, again...
I just found out Terri died. My mom is crying. Dad walked away and kicked over a trashcan. Everyone is yelling and the police are starting to tell everyone to leave. I think Gramma just fell down again.
Am I a sinner because I'm relieved? I hope not, but I just don't understand why we are here God. The sky is baby-blue this morning. If I pray hard enough I can hold Terri's hand and fly away with her into the baby-blue sky.
March 31, 2005
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