Jeopardy!’s catch phrase for this season’s Celebrity tournament is “The Star’s Come Out!”

Oh no they didn’t.

Carson Kressley, Isaak Mizrahi, Gayest Neil Patrick Harris and … slobber Christopher Meloni round out the cast of assembled “stars” to answer in the form of a question.

"Alex, I'll take failure to perform for $600!"

"You answer is: Lack of focus."

"What is the quality that will keep me way less gay than Neil Patrick Harris?"

"Correct."

My plans to abscond with NPH are suddenly secondary to the mandatory booing of Mizrahi and Kressley and tertiary to anything (I mean ANYTHING) that Christopher Meloni would have me do.

Of course Meloni would kick my butt for looking at him.

So back to Mr. Harris. I’ve discovered via the World Wide Web that he is taping TONIGHT! My apologies to Humanity, but my own selfish concerns take precedence over the dissing of two mincing ninnies.

Neil Patrick Harris is once again my sole focus. Tonight he shall be mine!

Unless Christopher Meloni says otherwise, duh.