April 21, 2006

Cinematic Arrest

I refuse to see Mission Impossible 3. Why? Cause of him. But not because of Philip Seymour Hoffman, who is playing the movie's villain and certainly not because of J.J. Abrams who is the director. Abrams is also set to direct the next Star Trek installment which will focus on Kirk and Spock at Starfleet Academy. I hope they make out. I hope Nnenna from America's Next Top Model plays young Uhura. I hope Joss Whedon casts Kate Beckinsale as young Wonder Woman. Who will play young Gayest Neil in my 2009 film biography, Myth, Mirth and Murder: the Legend of a Dandy? (Title pending actual homicide.)

Yikes! Uhmm? Sheesh. Woof. No. Sure.

Back to MI:3. I'm bummed out that these quality entertainers are attached to his movie. I'd watch Phillip Seymour Hoffman read a grocery list, nude. I've been of fan of J.J. Abrams since Sydney slapped on her first wig, even though Alias has lost my dedicated viewing, I've found a new J.J. addiction in the series Lost. Matthew Fox's nickname is (alledgedly) "pendulum" on the set. Drooooooooooooool.

Speaking of Alias, the stop animation series Robot Chicken did a hilarioius parody of the spy thriller with a short bit titled Whalias. In it Sydney Bristow is a killer whale wearing an evening gown and purple wig. Just like the series, she's a kung-fu fighting super spy. Killer whale indeed.

I love links.

So yeah, I'm boycotting Mission Impossible 3. Hand me a giant pacifier, I'm done.

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