April 26, 2005

Groovetastic Funk-o-Bot

I had no idea, but the poster in the subway got my fingers snapping and my toes a tapping. HOLY SHIT! WE'RE IN THE MIDST OF NATIONAL DANCE WEEK!!!! Why did noone tell me?

DJ lay down a funky beat! Let's kick it old school and peer back to 1995. There I am, Gayest Neil, waving my arms and stomping to the beat on a black wooden box at Boneshakers Athens' littlest, creepiest gay bar. I look so happy dancing and dressed in my favorite Attitude Dude t-shirt, lime green Adidas windpants and sporting a classic Rachel. It is Wednesday, 80's night, and the bar is packed with gay, country folk walking like Egyptians and dancing with themselves. Then the music slows and the lyrics of the next song melds into the mix and my heart starts to beat...
If I, I get to know your name
Well if I, could trace your private number, baby
All I know is that to me
You look like you're lots of fun
Open up your lovin' arms I want some, want some...
You spin me round round, baby right round.
It's Dead or Alive's You Spin Me Round (Like a Record)!!! I begin to twirl on the four foot tall box. Spinning faster and faster as the chorus plays louder and louder. In 1995, three Zimas (with lime) transformed me into a groovetastic funk-o-bot. On that particular night, I had embibed five said original malternatives, smoked an Ultra-lite and sipped half a shot of Jose; Gayest Neil was in partay mode! Until I tripped on my shoelaces and cracked my head against the bar wall. Nasty Jerry (who did a terrible Madonna there on Monday's drag night) asked me if I was ok. I was more than ok! I had the groove and my Keds clad feet were in a constant state of dance, concust or not.
Get out there and dance.

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